What's Up with O?

I have 4 novels this year:

1) an approved one, not sure when it's going to be published

2) a manuscript for revision, to be overhauled this week

3) a finished manuscript for editing

4) a new manuscript currently on chapter two


Kung tutuusin, malayo na ito sa word production ko from past years. Heck, I just surpassed my record of finishing 1 novel a year! That's something to be grateful for, right?

Also, I learned to move on fast from revisions. Like 10 minutes fast. How?

Business as usual. Nothing personal.

I'm beginning to see writing as work. Before, that's a scary thing. Kapag kasi naging trabaho na sa `yo ang bagay na nae-enjoy mo, may posibilidad na mawala na ang mahika n'on sa `yo. But that's not true. It's just about avoiding BURN OUT.

True, na may mga tunay na ermitanyo at ermitanya na walang ginawa kung` di magsulat araw-araw, gabi-gabi. Saludo ako sa kanila. Pero nakita ko sa sarili ko na hindi uubra sa `kin `yon. And I think I'm a multipotentialite anyway. Baka kaya kahit anong pilit kong pumili lang ng isang trabaho at manatili roon hanggang mag-retire ay hindi ko magawa. So I'm trying to sort out my abilities and my passion to see if I can use them to be my bread and butter and pasta and cheesecake and iced coffee.

Financially speaking, I accepted the fact that writing won't be able to provide a stable income for me. I still want to do it, regardless, because I like it. It's also less stressful for my body. But I learned to take sidelines, drafting jobs and even doing errands for other people. So far, I'm surviving and acceptance that any kind of job that is honorable is worth doing lessens the stress I subject myself to. It's like I stepped outside the narrow, comfy, society-labeled box.

But the highlight still is my word production. I can say that I'm getting the hang of writing as fast as I can. Mabilisan, dahil iyon ang paraan para maka-survive sa PHR. Mas marami kang librong mailabas, mas makakayanan mong buhayin ang sarili sa pagsusulat. Iyon din ang advantage at security ng sistema nila versus the usual royalty system. 

And I'm starting to have goals again. Writing them up, using them to motivate me.

But actually, someONE else motivates me right now.

I know, I know. Sanay na akong nguyain ang mga dati kong salita. I said before that I won't be bothered with a love life unless I attain success and stability. Pero kapag nakakilala ka pala ng taong naiintindihan ang individuality mo, ang need mong makagawa ng bagay para sa sarili mo at maging successful, mas may purpose pala talaga ang bawat gawin mo, bawat pangrap mo sa buhay. Hihi. Puwera usog.

So, iyon lang muna ang update sa buhay ni Olivette. 

Abangan ang susunod na kabanata...

#Olivetteinthenow

So sorry for the late replies.

Been busy being a writer again.

I'm trying to produce a manuscript within a month and I'm kinda getting the hang of it. Kailangan lang mag-ipon ng kilig.

I currently have a manuscript for evaluation at PHR. I don't like the waiting game, but it can't be helped. Sulat na lang ng susunod na manuscript.

Frankly, I have nowhere to go now. My previous dream of becoming-an-architect-and-then teaching-at-a-university-so-I'd-have-some-time-to-write FAILED BIG TIME. Humahadlang ang katawang-lupa ko. And it was a pathetic plan from the start. 

If I want to be a writer, why not be a writer today rather than five years from now?

So here I am, taking this as seriously as I can. But realistically, I could probably finish only one more manuscript before the year ends. I'm putting my hopes for next year again.

Sigh.

You see why I can't be bothered with a love life? No? Oh, well. I want to have a source of income before I even think about hooking up with someone. To be financially okay. Independent girl problems, yeah.

So to my readers, please bear with me.

To the people who love me, thank you.

Babangon ako nang paulit-ulit at magsusulat. Itaga n'yo sa something. Haha.

The Olivette Affair

I can't believe rainy days have the power to ignite my deeper emotions. To think I'm not comfortable with rain... But I guess, that's the reason why. Rain makes me pour words out, too. 

(warning: unedited: watch out for grammar bumps)

Update Privacy Settings?

You'll never realize the true importance of something until it's gone. No, I'm not referring to a loved one or tissue paper. 

I'm talking about privacy.

Non-Coffee Break

Reverted to manual writing these past few weeks. Ang problema lang ay kapag encoding na, hindi ko na mabasa ang sinulat ko. :'( And as usual, binabaha na naman ako ng insecurities and frustrations. 

I'm mostly half-depressed, half-insane when I'm writing. Myself is always not cooperating. The people around me don't care what I'm doing. They don't take me seriously and they constantly encourage me to stop writing. But that's all my fault. Who'd want a bum in their house, anyway? I have to admit that sitting somewhere and scratching on paper or staring in space may seem to some as doing nothing. It makes one think of what things they could make you do just so you won't look like you're having a good time just sitting there.

Only I'm not "having a good time" just sitting there.

Well, I do enjoy thinking out what happens next to my stories. I try my best to concentrate, to capture the best scenes and dialogues for that story. And in the middle of all that noise and distraction, I'd be lucky if I can finish a scene in my mind. And then I would have to recapture those ideas on paper, which requires some more desperate scratching and intense concentration while simultaneously uttering a prayer that everyone just leave me alone when I'm not starting a conversation with them.

I'm months past the deadline I set myself. Thank goodness that at least the publisher was lenient on us and understood our circumstances. Still, I want to write faster and better. And yeah, I know blogging won't add up words on my manuscripts. I just gave myself a little break, that's all. Too bad I can't drink coffee. Mixed with stress, it'll just give me heartburn. 

Well, off to writing again. Even while wrestling tons of doubts and fears, I still go forward. It's all I can do.

Good morning. :)